Bless and Do Not Curse

          On our way home Sunday afternoon from a week’s vacation, we were just beyond Portland on I-295. I set my cruise control on about 67-68. After a little while I came up behind a vehicle and moved out to pass. Because I was going only a few miles per hour faster than this vehicle I was not passing him very quickly. In the meantime, as is wont to happen, a vehicle came up behind me traveling faster than I was. He had to wait a short while for me to pass the vehicle on my right. I did not increase my speed in order to pass.

            I found out after I passed and signaled, and returned to the right lane that the driver behind me was not very happy with me. As he “roared” past me he beeped his horn. Now, we all know that the beeping of a car horn means different things. There is the quick “Hi, how are you doing!” double beep. Then there is the “I didn’t mean to beep!” beep, which is followed by gestures indicating “I’m sorry!” along with physical expressions of contrition. There is also a “Watch out!” beep, which we appreciate when we don’t see someone and are about to move into them. None of these were what I heard in those moments. Instead, I heard the “Hold your hand on it… sustained for at least a few seconds… get out of my way you jerk!” beep. This is the beep that communicates, “You are an idiot and I am angry at you. You have gotten in my way and slowed me down. How dare you!” This is the beep that sometimes begins an escalation of road rage.

            My new “friend” decided that the blowing of his horn was insufficient to convey his feelings. So, as he passed he also held out his right hand to me with the universal one-finger signal of contempt. And, for good measure, after he had gotten all the way past, he repeated this with his left hand out his driver’s window. I said to Joanne, “There goes a very angry man.” It was probably good (for me) that I was out of audio range. He probably had a few choice words that I was glad not to have to hear. For my part, I felt sorry for him. I had done nothing wrong except to slow him down briefly. His response was way out of bounds.

            Have you ever had this happen to you? It gives you a terrible feeling inside. Instantly I felt sorry for anyone I had ever acted angrily toward. And my heart ached for spouses and children who are the victims of verbal abuse. There is something disorienting and disturbing about unchecked anger directed at others. A recent World magazine article I read was about the increase of cussing (profanity) on the part of people who profess Christ. In the article, Carolyn Arends describes contempt as “a mixture of anger and disgust, expressed from a position of superiority. It denigrates, devalues, and dismisses.” Contempt – from mere eye-rolling to profane and abusive language to all manner of aggressive gestures – is a true relationship destroyer. Such words, gestures, and actions – in one form or another – are all a means of cursing and not blessing. Showing and speaking contempt is a way of cursing another person.

            How much more desirable is blessing. How often have I seen “hurry” leading to bad things happening! Our impatience with people can very easily lead us into sin. Cursing someone is, indeed, a serious… and a bad… thing. The transforming power of Jesus Christ, however, leads us to be peacemakers. It leads us to bless and not curse. It leads us to defer to others. It leads us to keep “hurry” from becoming our spiritual enemy.

            I encourage you to monitor your body – from your eyes to your face to your hands to your lips and what comes from them. Monitor your tone of voice. Look for signs of contempt trying to get control of you and get out of you. When you become aware of these things, then work at training yourself in the godly response of blessing… especially if it involves returning good for evil. The Holy Spirit helps those who seek to be faithful to Christ. Let’s live surrendered lives – placed at His disposal and filled with His power and grace.

Romans 12:14-21 (NIV) ¹⁴  Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. ¹⁵  Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. ¹⁶  Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. ¹⁷  Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. ¹⁸  If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. ¹⁹  Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. ²⁰  On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." ²¹  Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

 PRAYER: “Lord, may I not only experience Your peace within, but may I be a peacemaker who honors you in my everyday interactions with my spouse, children, siblings, parents, schoolmates, teammates, co-workers, and neighbors. Train me in the use of my face, my gestures, and my words to be like Jesus. Forgive my failures in this area and teach me to bless and not curse.  In Jesus’ name, AMEN.”

Jesus Christ is Lord!

Scott